In life we are governed by many rules and practice various rituals.
Some
(being a word that implicitly states that I couldn't be bothered to research this topic)
make sense whilst others are completely perplexing.
Man I'm good at being ambiguous.
The truth is, sometimes I don't want to say "well done" to a friend who has finished a race in 6th place,
yet I'm compelled to do so because it's polite but more importantly, they're probably giving me a lift home.
Unlike television shows such as 'Coca Cola Pop Stars', I don't think it's okay to encourage mediocrity.
Unless we're talking about my ability in the sack(which is the exception rather than the rule).
The way we react to certain situations is governed by social norms.
Don't believe me?!
Gentlemen
(which is a term I'm using very loosely because some of you reading this are man skanks *trademark pending*).
Have you ever been completely honest about your intentions to a woman
(I say woman assuming the ID policy at Vacca Matta is enforced properly) .
OF COURSE NOT!
Why?! Because no woman wants to hear
"I think your friend is hotter but you seem more eager. So, another Brutal Fruit?"
That scenario seemed a bit too close to home.
Men have to be coached to answer certain questions in a particular manner and we STILL find ways of f***ing it up.
In retrospect, using profanity in that last line was unnecessary. In my defense, I couldn't give a sh*t.
Where were we? if you must know, probably reading this off a Blackberry in South Africa.
Know thy audience Mo! Know thy audience.
There is always that ticking time-bomb that surfaces
like a Legoa/Snotkop album when you least expect it.
"Do these jeans make me look fat?"
Here are a few suggested answers:
1. NO............ All your clothing has that effect.
2. I told you to have the ladies portion of ribs last night.
3.1. I don't care how you look..............
3.2 ........because this probably isn't going to last anyway
4. If you're still reading these suggestions you're a d***.
Wow. I just realised why I was single for so long.
The unfortunate thing about society is that people who do not find themselves following the maxim (which is a real word) are seen as apathetic and cold-hearted which is not always the case. I'm not encouraging you to be harshly critical of everyone and everything you encounter but creating a society of delusional and narcissistic individuals is not the way to go either.
If a friend of yours is not pulling their weight at varsity or at work, you should be ballsy enough to tell them.
I understand the occasional white lie like "oppression was just an illusion" (just jokes my vanilla cake homies) but we owe it to ourselves to be honest to each other.
Is this beginning to sound preachy?
Perhaps now would be a good time to pull out the collection basket.
Aah, for f*** sake.
Who put all these coins in here?!
We also have a machine to swipe by the way.
The third book of the Bible is called Leviticus. It contains laws and priestly rituals.
Do you know how old this book is?
Are these laws still relevant?
Are society's unwritten laws still relevant?
......................
The ellipsis above was a sign for you to start thinking for yourself and asking your own questions.
That old law about 'an eye for an eye' leaves everybody blind. The time is always right to do the right thing.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
XOXO
PS.
If you can read this.......
THEN YOU CAN READ!
Wow, I just realised why i haven't been awarded the tender to print bumper stickers.
[NOTICE]
If you find any of the aforementioned content offensive please write to your senator, counselour, mayor, principal, guidance teacher or agony aunt at
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Who the f*** still using snail mail in 2011 street
IgnorantVille
P.O. Box
2145
Ta
